This time of year comes with so many mixed emotions. There is excitement to be with the people we love and celebrate our favorite holidays or sadness because we can’t. People begin to marvel at how quickly this year flew by and wonder about what’s on the horizon for the next. Intentions are set, vision boards are created, and resolutions are thought of.

While you don’t need a new year to do new things, there is an renewal that comes with having a clean slate to try it again.

And then there is a different kind of emotion that can begin to seep in.

Guilt.

Guilt that we are ____ age and haven’t met ________ goal. That we still haven’t started the business, bought the house, wrote the book, or found “the one”. Frustration that even as we feel accomplished in certain areas, we feel stagnant in others.

And then we begin to feel the urgency. The urgency to end the year with an Instagram worthy bang. To show everyone why 2019 was such an incredible year. If your social media feeds have looked anything like mine, then you’ve probably seen something like:

There’s only a few weeks left in this decade, how are you going to end it with a bang?

And the urgency meets anxiety and they start a dangerous love affair.

While I believe in a God of miracles and who is capable of giving me abundantly more than I could ever imagine, I wonder if we actually have to end this year with a bang? I wonder if we have to feel bad that we didn’t and instead start working toward our dreams for 2020 now.

My Problem

I’m always excited by the big idea. I can see the final product before I even take the first step. The vision is what fuels me. The details sometimes feel like small nuisances getting in my way.

I’ll make the vision board but won’t even think about the plan to get there let alone stick to one.

I don’t naturally lean toward someone who is type A. Because I know this, I’ve had to create structures that support me in executing. This has served me well.

But as I work to build in areas outside of my 9-5, I realize that because I haven’t created those same structures in other places, I haven’t seen the same kind of success.

So if you’re like me, come sit down. I’m on my chair and a half today so there’s plenty of room. It’s also about 8am so I can’t offer you wine, but I can make you a cup of tea.

In addition to tea, this blog is best served with something to capture some notes. I’m going to ask you to do a little writing.

Check your motives.

Before we start preparing for the kind of year we want, we have to do a little introspection. Regardless of how we’re feeling leaving this year and walking into the next, we have to think about our why.

What about our newest endeavors for 2020 make us the most excited? The need that we are able to fulfill within our communities or ourselves or the Instagram likes and comments that will come as a result? Would you still invest your time energy and resources into “it” if there was no around at the end when you were finished?

If you’re frustrated by the way you are walking out of 2019, is it because you’ve identified areas in your life where you didn’t give it your best effort? Or are you letting the expectations of others dictate how you see yourself and choices?

Think about why you’re feeling restless and unsure as this new decade approaches. Are you not doing more with the time, talents, and treasure you have in order to only do what you can do well or are you afraid to dream bigger?

Now isn’t the time to be harsh with yourself, but it is an opportunity to be honest. It’s not enough to simply acknowledge the feelings if we’re going to do more in this next year. We have to get to the root of them.

Stop & Jot: What do you want to do in 2020 and why? How will accomplishing these goals help you live on the calling that’s been placed on your life?

Sis, I don’t even know the calling.

What stirs your heart? What would you be willing to work on even if you weren’t being paid?

Less bang more build.

You might not end this year with a bang, but that doesn’t mean you can’t start building now. Don’t wait until 2020 to start working for your 2020 dreams. Start planning content now for your new blog. Begin the brainstorming and planning process for the book you want to write now. If your desire is for a healthier body, start building the habits that you’ll need to sustain you now.

It’s not enough to have the vision, but no idea how to execute it. Start reading the books, making the plan, waking up at the right time, and getting it done.

With the right intentions and a solid plan you are already that much closer to reaching your goals, sis. I’m excited for you!

Stop & Jot: What are the books you need to read, people you who can help you, or schedules/structures you need in place in order to help you achieve in this building season? Is the way you spend your time conducive to achieving your goals?

Always trust God’s Divine Providence

We can make our plans, but the Lord determines our steps.

Proverbs 16:9

I was sharing my heart with my therapist when she reminded me that I’m not big enough to thwart any of the plans God has and I can’t tell you how much peace that brought me.

Not because I’m not powerful or competent on my own, but because under the protection of God’s plan for my life, I’m even moreso. And I will humbly submit to that plan every day of my life. Even if I have to do it with an attitude sometimes because it doesn’t look like what I want.

He’s not through with me yet. K?

I want to be disciplined enough to stick to the plan that I created to further God’s Kingdom. I want to be flexible and quiet enough to let God repurpose or completely recreate that plan however He sees fit. At the recommendations of my friends and therapist, I recently started reading Atomic Habits . What makes it so good is how practical it is. I’m not playing about the types of habits that will allow me to carry my purpose.

But at least I know I’m giving a humble offering to work with when I take the time to create a plan with good motives and thoughtful directions.

So let’s get to gettin’!

It is the first week in the last month of this decade.

And you don’t have to go out with any sort of bang.

But you can start building the most authentic version of yourself and your life right now.

There is magic in our musings, plans, and God’s providence,
Nicole