A few weeks ago I reposted something from the CEO of CurlBox, Myleik Teele’s instagram. It read:

If every single day you wake up completely in comfort…no butterflies in your stomach….chances are you aren’t doing much of anything.

And as I kept on talking to friends and colleagues, I realized that there are a lot of people in this place.

This itchy uncomfortable place that used to fit you so well.

That season, no matter how long or short, where you feel like what you are meant to do and what you are currently doing don’t align.

Just as there are things we should be actively doing to fight complacency, there are some unhealthy habits we should also steer clear of.

So before we all decide to quit our jobs, sell our homes, and travel off into the unknown, let’s do a little reflecting.

Comparison is the thief of joy.

In a season where you feel complacent or just unmotivated, the most dangerous thing you can do is start comparing your season of unfulfillment to someone else’s highlight reel.

Earlier today, a former colleague who recently started a new job reached out to ask about had I heard from any of the opportunities I was actively seeking.

The fact I had to say “no” damn near killed me. It put me in such a funk that everybody (read 1 person) in the whole world is doing exactly what it is that they love, while I sit here in despair (read I was flat out jealous).

See, I don’t just check y’all.
I’ve got to check myself too.

So you already know I’m going to tell you to check yourself.

Pay attention to the season.

If you’ve been in your career for an extended period of time, you know there are peaks and valleys.

Pay attention to the seasons of your work and how you feel in each.

Do you need to re-evaluate everything you are working for and towards right now or do you become restless every March because it is a high stress time in your industry?

Instead of a new job, do you just need a well planned weekend getaway and some quiet time?

We’ll talk about the importance of ensuring our day to day is maximizing our gifts–but leaving what you are purposed to do because you aren’t in tune with the seasons of your work is just as heartbreaking as doing work that you aren’t fulfilled by.

Don’t run to the next thing believing it’s going to be your saving grace–if you don’t know about you, no job is going to fix your frustrations.

Don’t think you aren’t complacent because you aren’t miserable.

I love the people I work with.
And the kids I work for.
I am happy at work.

And I’ve realized being happy and being fulfilled are different.

Happiness can be a part of fulfillment, but I don’t think it’s the only ingredient.

Growth comes from challenge. We can’t continuously live in a state of permanent difficulty, but if you’re comfort is keeping you from becoming a better version of you, it may be time reevaluate some things.

Okay, I know you’re over here like:

Im SoOo GlAd YoU ToLd Me AlL oF ThaT.
NoW What.

1. You’re welcome.
2. Don’t be rude.

Now that we’ve checked ourselves and our motives, we can start thinking about setting our intentions differently through some good ol’ self-reflection.

What is frustrating you?

Someplace I’ve been looking in order to gain clarity lately is in my frustrations.

Which I know sounds crazy, but I’ve been using what keeps me up and frustrates me about the current realities of my work to help understand where I should be next.

Listening to what has frustrated me has literally started me on the hunt for a new job.

No, I still haven’t found it…but that’s okay because there’s joy in the unknown.

Maybe your frustration won’t remove you from your current role, but it will give you the spark you need to find a solution for the thing that is a real pain point for your organization.

It could push you to bring forth the idea that you have been sitting on forever now.

Or it could identify the next step you need to take in order to better yourself.

So get honest about what is frustrating you and leverage it to determine what comes next.

Where do your skills and passions intersect?

I love teaching. I get as much joy from teaching kids as I do from teaching adults.

And while I was pretty terrible at it at the beginning, God blessed me with natural aptitude to connect with other people. I love people as much as I love teaching. So even when my skills were non-existent, my passions forced me to keep going.

You peep that?
I didn’t decide to rest on only what I was passionate about.

I let that passion fuel my desire to strengthen my skills.
Passions pushed me to build strong habits.
Strong habits built focused discipline.
Focused discipline yielded quality results.

It was never enough that I just liked my work.
I wanted to be great at it.

7 years later and I’ve had the opportunity to work with some well known entities in education getting paid to do the things I really enjoy.

I believe God gives us everything we need to do what He’s called us for–but that doesn’t mean we don’t have to do the work necessary to build those skills.

What do you love so much you’re willing to keep working even when you’re frustrated, tired, and just plain don’t want to do it?

How can you take what you’re already skilled at to the next level?

The answers to these questions will provide you with the direction you need to find you’re way out of this funk.

How do you want to spend your time?

In my 20’s the theme has been to grind. I was humble and hungry and just trying to prove my worth in my industry.

And while I don’t think I can ease up on any of those things as I approach my thirties, there’s been a shift in my approach to doing life. A willingness to (strategically…cause ya girl has a mortgage) pivot when my daily choices aren’t helping me to achieve the kind of lifestyle I want.

I didn’t need flexibility in my 20s. A 12 hour school day didn’t hurt like it does now. I could lesson plan and grade until 1am, wake up at 6am, and stay at school until 6:30pm working as the after school advisor for a student club.

That doesn’t work anymore.

But I had to do that then so that I would know that it wasn’t sustainable for me now.

So how do you want to live? When you think about the things that matter most to you (flexibility, financial freedom, travel) does your current life help you invest your time, energy, and resources into those things?

The answer could be yes right now and that’s amazing, but it doesn’t mean it will always be a yes.

I do an annual performance review. Not with my employer, but of my employer. Let me explain.

My Annual Performance Review

Every single year, I’ve looked for a new job. Not because I had any plans of leaving my current place of employment, but because I want to be sure of a few things:

1. Where I am is the best place for me to be
2. The types of stretch and growth opportunities needed to stay competitive
3. I remain grateful

A few years ago, I realized I needed experiences managing adults. It was hard to get a new job because of that lack of experience. It was then I knew this was an opportunity I could ask my employer about.

During that time, I knew that leaving wasn’t the right thing for me to do. I hadn’t found anything that excited or motivated me in the way that my current work did, I just knew I needed a stretch opportunity to stay sharp.

And knowing that kept me grateful. Knowing that the place I was where I was supposed to be, allowed me to beat my complacency not with change, but with gratitude.

Work should be mutually beneficial. That doesn’t mean you won’t have to pay your dues or grind more or less in different seasons. But you better believe that if your job found you unsatisfactory, they would do what is in the best interest of the company and sever ties.

So why don’t we evaluate our employers and make the same strategic determinations?

Prayer, planning, and flexibility will be necessary if you decide where you are isn’t where you should be.

Prayer, discipline, gratitude and rest will be necessary if you decide where you are is exactly where you belong.

Either way, I’ve found the biggest way to fight complacency is to continuously take stock of who I am, what I want, and how what I am doing is actively keeping from or pushing me closer to those goals.

There’s magic in our musings, evaluations, and reflections,
Nicole